My precious boy

Just a few piccies of my precious little man playing in our new backyard. Well, I'm not sure I would call it 'playing' as there is very little in the way of toys or equipment out there at the moment, but he's having fun anyway!

He loves exploring around corners and playing with anything and everything that he comes across. Ordinarily I would be a nervous wreck and I would be following him all over ensuring he wasn't putting rocks in his mouth or skinning his knees etc etc...it's with great willpower that I sit reading a magazine (or a Stampin' Up! catalogue! ha ha), only sneaking around to check up on him every 2 minutes or so! I really am doing all that I can to slowly let him have some independence and, so far, success! He is learning to come to me (or cry or scream!) if he wants me and I am learning that he is more capable than I give him credit for. What a big boy!

Last chance!

Today is the absolute last day of ordering from the 2007-2008 Stampin' Up! Idea Book and Catalogue! I am not placing an order but I still feel the slight anxiety one feels on knowing it's the last chance something is able to be done...regardless of how much one wants to do it! I've got to say though that the new Idea Book and Catalogue is so fantastic that once midnight hits and it becomes 'active', I will not be looking back! Gosh they have done a good job having a few major themes this time around which run through the whole range of products...gorgeous themes too! I am one happy demonstrator!

Remembering...

I have a few pics to share tonight.

Today marks 1 whole year since my Dad died tragically in a fire. I don't think that I dealt with his death last year but I believe that I've begun to now, as of this morning, thankfully. It was such a difficult thing to process as we didn't have the regular father/daughter relationship. Instead, we left QLD in 1980 (when I was 2yrs old) without him and I might have seen him a handful of times before my teenage years (and spoken on the phone maybe twice as many times). When I was studying at uni I went on a road trip by myself and visited him and one of my step-sisters, and we spoke on the phone and wrote letters pretty regularly from then on. He wasn't the best at keeping in touch though and I remember feeling disappointed quite regularly. We would always get back in touch after these periods of disappointment however, and, for what must have been a year before he died the contact had been more regular than before...he had a job he enjoyed, he had his brother next door, friends, and was planning a visit to see my sisters and I (and meet our husbands and his grandchildren). He never made it here in the end so I guess some things will have to stay 'unfinished'.

We travelled out West for his funeral (with one of my local sisters being the organiser) and saw the remains of his house (actually his brother's house). We each took a lump of some kind of quartz from the rubble to remember him by (apparently they were all lined up by a little fence). Our lump/rock has been in our garage all this time but today I asked Remmy to place it in our backyard. I don't yet have a photo but I'll post one up when I take one...we'll make it a little area dedicated to Dad. It's special that we were able to do that today, a year ago we would never have imagined we would own our own home and therefore have somewhere to place our lump!

Something else we took from the rubble was amazingly a poem I had written when I was 14 and sent Dad! It was about his mum (my Nan). When you look at the above photos of the rubble it's hard to believe anything could be found, let alone a solitary piece of paper! This was the only thing we were able to salvage so it's pretty special!

My Dad worked as a tour guide for a mine in Broken Hill. He would take people underground and teach them how the miners lived. He loved his job so we couldn't leave without doing the tour he would have taken people on many many times. It was truly frightening I have to say! I have never felt claustrophobic before in my life but I was too too close to screaming out that I couldn't breathe while we were undergroud with only the guide's torch on to illustrate the working conditions! My goodness I don't know how I got through it but this photo was taken upon emerging, was a great feeling to see the light of day again, I don't know how Dad coped! He used to be a bit of an adrenalin-junkie though, as I'm told. He used to drive like a crazy man on dirt roads, he loved doing stunts in his car just for the fun of it (for example, one of his colleagues told me how he would close gates by swinging his car around as if it were a hand!), and he even got his pilots licence. I guess a little underground darkness wouldn't pose too much of a problem!

He had a bit of a sense of humour that I'm guessing many people didn't know how to take! After the funeral we took home with us a briefcase full of his personal effects that his brother had kept at his house and, amongst it all, was this Christmas card he had written for Remmy, Jasper and I and never sent! He didn't forget to send it or anything, we definitely received a card from him that year...this one must have been one he had written and then changed his mind about sending as he may have anticipated that Remmy would be offended! It's quite funny to read but, like I said, I'm guessing that he offended his fair share of people with his kind of humour. It's admirable that he recognised this in himself though, not many do! I appreciated that he was never pretentious. He used to be very honest to me even when it made him look atrocious! He also gave me his candid version of events between him and my mother and, based upon all I had ever heard, he was honest about this too.




Before we left Broken Hill last year we took one last trip to his grave site and placed some flowers.

So did my sister's as they left town...



So one year has gone and I still haven't got to see my Dad, Remmy still hasn't met his Father-in-law, and Jasper hasn't met his Grandad. I have been unsure about what I am supposed to be feeling for most of the year but now I realise that whatever I'm feeling is ok. What I'm feeling now is incredible sadness. Sadness that Dad won't get to enjoy all the good things in life again, sadness that there were so many disappointments, sadness that we didn't get to see each other just one last time. One of my sisters says that when it comes to losing someone there is never enough time you can spend with them, so there's no point dwelling on this. This is true I guess so I won't dwell on the sadness, instead I will just 'remember'...

Hello baby!

Dear bubba,

Yesterday Jasper, Daddy and I travelled to a city a couple of hours away just so we could get a glimpse of your beautiful self! We were so excited to be able to confirm that you are a little boy and that you're growing well with no problems in sight. We discovered that you apparently have long legs for your age, that you are on average measuring 5 days ahead of your 'dates', that you have some spikey looking hair (!!) and that you are too cheeky (or shy!) as you wouldn't let us see your face in 3D! ha ha. Actually the ultrasound machine is really rather strange in that we could see your beautiful face in 2D but, when switched over to 3D, the view was obscured by your arm and hand, your umbilical cord, and also some placenta! The sonographer had me jumping up and down in the bathroom, wriggling and jiggling you as much as we could while I was lying down, and we even tried me up on the table on all fours but still that hand wouldn't budge! ha ha. Nevermind, we were so happy to see you, even for a second! It was well worth the trip...I would do it again in a heartbeat! Speaking of heartbeats...while I was waiting for my disc of photos of you to be processed a different sonographer asked me to come back in as they had "forgotten" to do something! Of course I welcomed the chance to see you again! :) It turned out that they wanted to check the blood flow through the cord and, just in case you're interested one day, I'm happy to report that you were apparently travelling very well and were nice and relaxed!

I feel as though I have bonded with you so much already. I am amazed at how different you are already to your big brother too! I always thought I would do my best not to "compare" my children, in the negative sense of the word, but I am pleasantly surprised to find that there is no negative comparisons possible! I absolutely adore that you and he are different and I promise you that I will always celebrate your differences and do my best to help you feel as special in your own right as I can. I'm sure you won't always think I am being a fair mum but hopefully when you are grown you can look back and see that I put a great deal of energy into fairness. :)

I am really looking forward to meeting you but I also don't want this pregnancy journey to be over so quickly! We only have another 8 weeks or so together, I can't believe how fast time is flying by! I am getting more and more uncomfortable by the day but I'm loving you more and more each day too, so will endure all the pain in the world if I have to! I thought this little letter would be more profound, more revealing, and even more 'cute' than it is (as that is how I think of you in my head!) but I guess no words can ever express what I want to express -- especially not at this late hour! ha ha. I think about you all the time baby boy and will see you very soon.

Lots of love,

Mummy.

xxxxxxxx

A photographic surprise!

I went to my parents' house yesterday to get copies of some of the piccies they've taken on their cameras over the past few months and look what I found:

These beautiful photos (amongst one million more!) were taken when Remmy and Jasper met up with Terry at a place called Mack's Reserve on the 2nd of March. It was very much a spontaneous thing as Remmy was keen to get out of the house while I was acting hairdresser and Terry was taking the dogs for a run.

I copied the photo file entirely and only looked through them late last night. I was so amazed at just how many fabulous pics were there that I texted Terry straight away. Hmmm, might need to gently shove my boys out the door again very soon to meet up with Terry!

31 weeks + 1

These pics were taken on Friday 21st March. Just wanted to get them up before my 3D scan tomorrow! I'm so excited to be able to see my baby! He has been hurting me with his kicks and shoves lately but there's no limit to the pain I will grin through for him.

An Easter pic

I am so tired! My un-born baby unfortunately isn't! He is doing such a dance in there that, despite my massive desire to curl up in bed after a lovely warm shower, I am here...obviously! ha ha (see, told you I was tired! lol)

This pic is of my beautiful niece Grace and I. I think I mentioned before that we've done this same pose for the previous couple of years too, to measure our height. I don't know how she compares to her 13yr old friends but she sure is tall next to her 'almost' 30yr old Aunty! Her younger sister is quickly catching up to me so maybe next year I will have to have two pics taken!

New beginnings

We did it! We're finally in our first home! We still have boxes galore hanging around but we've done really well with organising the main furniture, all the clothes are in the appropriate rooms (Remmy's and mine, Jasper's, and even the little bubba has his clothes in his wardrobe), kitchen cupboards are all organised, and the washing is under control. We still have toys inhibiting our every move but hey, everyone is happy and fairly relaxed, which I'm so so so thankful for! The little list we started of things we need for the house isn't so little anymore but we're in no real rush to change anything (well, apart from the front and laundry door locks...we needed to add deadbolts for insurance purposes so we just bought 2 sets with bolt + regular lockable door handles). We have a 'catch-cry' we're using at least a dozen times each day..."is it a priority??" It's interesting what one person classes as a priority over what the other thinks (I'm referring both to priorities of time and effort while organising the house as well as priorities of spending)! We're getting along surprisingly well though and are both feeling 'heard', which is great for two people who both love to be in charge!

Jasper has been amazing throughout the whole packing/moving/unpacking fiasco, he has surprised me so much! He has been content to play around the boxes and, apart from skipping just a couple of his day-sleeps when we first moved in, his routine has been virtually unchanged...what a little trooper! He is growing up before our very eyes though I'm noticing, as tomorrow -- his 18month birthday -- nears. Just as a 'for instance', today marked the first time he has ever openned a regular door handle all by himself (thank goodness we were organised and bought the white door handle security thingies last week!), the first time he has climbed up onto the window ledge and back down again (and had me trust that he's perfectly in control and go back to what I was doing), and the second night in a row that he's not wanted his bedtime bottle on my lap in the lounge room before being put to bed. Instead we've sent him to bed with a bottle -- a bottle he didn't touch last night and I'm hoping he won't touch tonight so we can stop it completely. I usually make him a milkshake each afternoon so I'm sure he doesn't need the extra at night. Remmy weighed him tonight and he's a whopping 14.5kg! Lately his appetite has been fantastic, I've never had to worry about his nutritional needs being met, I sure am one lucky mum! Like we predicted he loves being outside. I've taken a few photos (and even some video footage of him kicking around in a mud puddle out the back) but I don't yet know where my discs are hiding so am hesitant to copy them off my memory card onto the computer in case I forget to back them up. I'll post a few for sure as soon as possible.

I can't update you on the family without including the soon-to-be addition! This little one is growing fast and suprising me with his painful kicks! I honestly don't remember Jasper ever hurting me like this bub does! I think the reason might be that, while he was supposedly head-down at my last appointment, I'm almost certain that he's lying sideways now. His sudden stretches are hold-onto-the-bench material and, just last night, he moved constantly for at least 20 minutes! This was so lovely for me but Remmy was looking worried about what kind of monster we have created! ha ha. I'm counting down the days until we get to see this little man...Tuesday is so soon! It will only be a few weeks before the gestational age of Jasper when we had his 3D scan but I'm strangely not anticipating seeing our baby look like, well, a baby! I am going to be pleasantly surprised when I see how perfect he is. I took some updated belly piccies this morning so will post them soon.

Happy Easter!
xxx

Always the way!

Well we're officially packing for the move to our very own house. Yes, I know we're moving the day after tomorrow and we only started packing yesterday but we're doing surprisingly well considering the whole house has come down with a nasty combination of gastro/sinusitis/common cold! When we most need rest we can't afford rest...isn't this always the way?

Here are a couple of my gorgeous little man playing around the chaos that is packing...

I've also been making a few cards this week...three anniversary cards (one sister's 1st wedding anniversary, another sister's 15th anniversary, and brother-in-law's 10th anniversary), 3 birthday cards (sister-in-law's 30th, brother-in-law's 22rd, and niece's 13th), and one spare.

I'll be back with some piccies of our new house as soon as our internet is sorted out at the other end. So exciting!

Creative me!

The explanation mark in the title is because I am always surprised when people comment on how creative I am! It's strange because I really really love most creative things (crochet, scrapbooking and card-making, playing the saxophone, drawing, painting, interior design, fashion, photography, writing, even organising such things as fitness programs and other goal-oriented pursuits) yet I struggle to think of myself as a creative person.

Today I went to a baby shower (which also turned out to be a tuppaware party...yes, I couldn't resist and ordered a few things!). My gift was about as creative as they come...I had crocheted the baby boy a little rug...

...made a card for the parents...

...and wrapped it all up in wrapping paper I lovingly stamped with a blue hearts background repeated to look seamless. I did also include a toy for the bub but, as that wasn't made by me, I won't dwell on that. ha ha

An old friend of mine, questioned on what he thought my ideal job would be, surprised me and said an architect. While this may be a far cry from psychology (which I know I will also enjoy once working in the field), I don't think I realised at the time just how well he knew me...I think he would have called me a creative person!

Discoveries

There comes a time in every parent's life when they encounter a scene like this one...

...but I shudder to think what may have happened if he wasn't 'discovered' right then!

Do you know something else that surprised me today? Jasper had a swimming lesson so as usual Remmy took him in the water while I watched from the sidelines (I feel it's a bit hot for my pregnant self in that water plus I don't like my chances of finding bathers to flatter! ha ha). One mother came up to me afterwards and praised Jasper on doing really well today, and another came up to me and told me how much Jasper loves the social aspects of the lessons! I nodded in agreement but secretly wondered if she was referring to a different Jasper. I questioned Remmy about this once we'd left and yes, apparently he is a little social butterfly and his very own mother didn't know! Apparently the reason he's often crying throughout the lessons is because he wants to interact with the other babies/toddlers/older kids hanging around on the pool steps! At mother's group he is usually the one off to the side playing by himself quietly (or screaming because someone doesn't want to give him their food/drink!) so it's no wonder I thought he was more independant! I would always do my best to nurture social skills in Jasper (as I would any other skill) but I'll be paying particular attention now that I'm aware he has a natural interest. Despite my feeling sad I didn't see this first, I'm so proud that his little personality is coming out.

We finally bought some removalists boxes today. It's hard to believe that this time next week we will be living in our very own house! Man have we got some work to do!

Milestones in heels...

I had a proud mummy day yesterday! I was proud of Jasper for seeming to have achieved some cognitive milestones and so proud of myself for knowing my son so well that I noticed them. The cognitive milestones I speak of might not be actual 'milestones' but they certainly seem to be. The first difference I noticed was in how well he was role-playing all of a sudden. He fished elmo out of his orange tub trug toy-bin and gave him a cuddle and kiss when I promted him to. We were then putting elmo into various vehicles (like his little people bus) and Jasper was wheeling them around. He was later doing this kind of thing with other soft toys...he wasn't treating them that way even a day before! When Remmy got home from work we were chatting about his newfound ability to role-play and then we heard clop, clop, clopping down our hall! This is what we found...

[might need to add videos later...problem with computer!]

We were laughing so much, him putting on one of my shoes illustrated his new ability perfectly! Remmy then decided that one shoe wasn't enough...look at how well this child can walk in heels! Too funny!

Another clever thing I noticed him do was just after dinner...he did an almighty burp and I called him a piggy, making him laugh. I repeated myself and he laughed again, grabbed his toes and said, "little piggy" -- lately we have been doing that nursery rhyme on his toes...this little piggy went to market, this little piggy stayed home...etc etc! I was so proud!

Just another Saturday

Another Saturday, another swimming lesson for my little man. He did so well today...he learnt how to pull up his whole body weight on a bar (which one day he will shimmy along) and also how to climb out of the pool. I was a very proud side-liner! Here are some piccies I took over lunch, he's usually famished after swimming (not that he doesn't always have a healthy appetite!)!

I forgot to take an updated belly pic on Thursday (when I was 28 weeks) so here is my 28 weeks, 2 days shot from above! My bump looks deceivingly petite here which is why I'm showing this one, and this one only! ha ha

Remmy and I were up so late last night (it must have been sometime after 1am that we finally fell into bed) because we were on a cleaning spree! I still can't believe that we'll be moving to our very own house in under two weeks, but life goes on and this humble abode must be re-let. For all our troubles the mother and daughter who came through at 9am were gone by 9:05am but seemed impressed. I hope they decide to move in because I don't think I can take another clean up!

Is anyone else surprised that March is upon us already?!